phil jones2 Page 26

  Darwin shot to his feet, sending dishes everywhere and causing the Voravians to shift uncomfortably. 'There's a lizard destroying a Star Command flag? Where is he?'

  'Hypothetically, sir.' Annika supplied in a placating tone.

  'What does medicine have to do with destroying our flag, Lieutenant?'

  It was at this point that Annika decided to leave the explaining to Smith.

  'Captain...' the Agent started again. 'You don't like your flag being damaged or destroyed, can you see why they wouldn't like their flag being damaged too?'

  Darwin frowned, as if in great thought over the question posed. 'But Smith, this isn't my flag. Why would I care if there was a bit of food on it?'

  'Because we're in a diplomatic negotiation, Captain. We want these Voravians to be our friends.'

  'Oh very well then.' Darwin finally conceded. 'I can't believe they'd be so worked up over a flag, that's just silly.'

  Smith suppressed a groan but said nothing further, realising this was probably as good as it got.

  'The Captain wishes to express his sincere apologies for upsetting the present dignitaries.' Smith said to The Translator.

  Said dignitaries grunted non-committally but didn't look on the verge of drawing weapons any time soon, it would appear that negotiations could finally begin.

  'How exactly does anyone confuse a napkin for a flag? I didn't think Darwin was the napkin type.'

  'He never fully explained how he managed to pull that stunt off. If I didn't know any better I'd have thought that he did it deliberately just to antagonise the Voravians. It would certainly explain what happened next.' Annika said.

  'Wait... there's more?'

  She shook her head. 'The worst is yet to come unfortunately. Negotiations were going well enough thanks to the combined efforts of RJ and Smith, Darwin having fallen asleep at the table. Fortunately this rude act was forgiven by the Voravians as it meant they didn't have to deal with the man any more. That was until...'

  'Should we... wake him?' RJ asked.

  The Translator gurgled with unsubdued laughter, his mood considerably lighter now that he no longer had to deal with Darwin. 'Can you not take his sleeping form back to your ship?'

  It turned out that the Voravians weren't as different RJ had thought, simply misunderstood because of their appearance. The foundations for a lasting peace had been constructed over this productive meeting, all they needed to do was make it back to their ship and the mission would be a success.

  To think, he had thought the convoy was an invasion fleet, when in truth it was the Voravians that feared reprisal from their human foes after the experiment from the Human Genome Project had seemed so anti-Voravian and cast them as a villains of the piece.

  'Captain Darwin sir?' Annika said, gently prodding him. 'Captain?'

  Smith shook his head. 'That's now how you wake a man like Darwin. Observe.'

  The Agent motioned for the Voravians to close their ear canals and took a deep breath. 'ADMIRAL ON DECK!'

  Darwin shot bolt upright, drool sticking to the table as he did so. 'What? Where? Who? Burroughs?'

  Smith nodded his head at the Voravians before suggesting silently that Annika continue.

  'Well done sir! Most succinctly put!' she cried, causing him to spin his head in her direction.

  'What? Oh...yes, negotiations.' he took a breath and faced the Voravian delegate. 'I hope you find those terms equitable.'

  'Most equitable, it has been a pleasure doing business with a man of your calibre, Captain Darwin.' The Translator replied.

  'I have no idea what that gurgling lizard said, but it sounded positive to me!' the Captain replied, elbowing Smith uncomfortably in the ribs.

  'Your negotiation skills continue to astound me, Captain Darwin.'

  'Back to the ship we go then!'

  There was much bowing and a few formal goodbyes, which featured a distinct lack of handshakes on the part of the Voravians, then they were on their way back to their vessel.

  'I'm glad that's all done and dusted then.' Darwin addressed the crew as they walked through the Voravian vessel. 'It might seem very overwhelming approaching this place and dealing with these sorts, but I think they got a very good idea of what Star Command and Captain Darwin are all about.'

  'That they did, sir.' RJ replied, a smile on his face.

  'When you think about it, there were so many things that could have gone wrong, but I think I steadied our course and helped forge a lasting relationship with these lizard folk.' Darwin pontificated.

  Smith said nothing.

  The soldiers guiding them clearly didn't understand galactic basic, and The Translator purposefully ignored Darwin's words for obvious reasons. RJ just hoped they could make it to the ship without the idiot doing something cataclysmic.

  'What's this over here?' Darwin asked, distracted by something at the side of the room they were passing through.

  The Translator wasn't listening, and Annika didn't react in time to pose the question to him. Darwin scooped his hand into what looked like a metallic trough mounted to the wall and sniffed at the black substance seeping through his hands like a curious child before shoving it in his mouth.

  'Oh my!' he exclaimed. 'You Voravians are quite the jokers, aren't you? Saying there was no dessert and then springing this upon me!' he took another scoop full of the black goop and poured it into his mouth. 'Absolutely delicious stuff this, I have to get myself a Voravian cook. Eating like this is far better than anything Star Command could come up with, what what!'

  The Voravians screeched, levelling their weapons at Darwin, but Smith was quicker. He leaped into the fray and disarmed both with swift kicks.

  'Captain!' Annika cried. 'That's their young!'

  Darwin stared down at the dark substance that continued to trickle through his fingers. 'Young? Strange name for a dessert, then again this is a strange race altogether. What's Smith doing with those lizards? Some kind of ceremonial handshake I guess?'

  'This... This is an outrage!' The Translator bellowed.

  'Yes! Yes it is delicious!' Darwin yelled back at him. 'Tell him I think it's delicious, Lieutenant!'

  That was when all hell broke loose.

  'And that was when all hell broke loose.' Annika finished.

  'He ate their children for dessert?'

  She nodded sadly. 'An act of war so heinous that the Voravian Empire has demanded to crush all of Star Command in order to prevent men like Darwin from continuing to exist.'

  Phil stared for a moment, taking his time in processing everything he had just heard. 'They're waging war on all of mankind based on Darwin being our representative?'

  'That's right Captain.'

  He rose and paced up and down his room. Loathed as he was to admit it, that motivation actually made a lot of sense.

  'So shortly after, he went mental and aimed a gun at RJ's head, resulting in your ejecting him from the craft permanently, right?'

  'He also shot the delegate twice in the face and called his wife as beautiful as a bowl of petunias in perfect Voravian, we're not entirely sure how he did that but we're guessing it has something to do with the eggs he had ingested.'

  'That's... quite the adventure.' Phil said, continuing to wear out the deck plating in the hopes that ideas would come seeping through the surface.

  'Not one that I'd like to repeat, Captain.' she said, watching his continued motions as if he were a one man tennis match. 'Is something wrong sir?'

  He stopped mid stride and turned to face her. 'Do I seem less stupid to you?'

  This question clearly caught her by surprise, if the startled look on her face was anything to go by.

  'Stupid, Captain? From the first moment I saw you I knew that you were the chosen one.'

  Phil laughed. 'You mean when I fell over and triggered Star Command's self destruct mechanism? Yeah... you were on to a real winner there.'

  If the first question had shocked her, the second statement had her positively a
stounded. 'Captain you may be a touch clumsy on occasion, but I believe that everything you did happened for a reason and you have vindicated that through keeping both the ship and crew in one piece on numerous occasions.'

  He shrugged. 'I believe you, I just hope your faith isn't being misplaced this time.'

  The surprise melted away from her features had been replaced with something that Phil couldn't read. 'I told you that you were my hero, I hope you don't forget that.'

  'I just don't feel any different Annika, I thought the glove would bring about this great change in my life and that I'd Captain this ship once again and that things would somehow be easier.'

  'Do you think it's any different for the rest of us, Captain Jones?'

  He stopped speaking, realising how defeatist and stupid he sounded, it was then his brain realised that he was completely stumped by the question that had just been asked. 'What do you mean, different?'

  'We're the same Captain, we are all in this together and none of us truly know what we're doing out here. Even Agent Smith for all his cool composure has never defied Star Command before. He might put up a front but deep down I know he's struggling, hurting for having defied his duty but knowing that it was the only reasonable thing he could have done.'

  Crossing over to the replicator she ordered a water and continued speaking with the glass in her hand. 'There's not a day goes by that I don't think I'm some stupid trader girl that got caught up in an intergalactic conflict far too big for her to ever cope. It's that lack of self-importance that has kept me alive all these years, knowing that I'd have to do my very best to survive and even then it might not be enough.'

  Phil looked at her tight grip upon the glass and the resolution in her face and saw her for what she truly was. Except for one problem that is...

  'You are the smartest woman I've ever met, of course you're capable of doing these things.'

  Her expression softened considerably, and her eyes found his. 'And you are the bravest man I've ever met, Phil Jones.'

  Phil gulped as she crossed the room again, painfully aware of how close she was getting. He didn't feel very brave right now. A Voravian attack, an unexpected visit, anything would be preferable to this right now.

  The door chimed, and it was followed by a little noise of frustration from Annika that sent a shiver up Phil's spine.

  'I think that's for me.' he said, stupidly.

  'I had best take my leave then.' she replied in a quiet tone.

  'Yes.' he said, uncertain as to what he was agreeing with.

  The door chimed again and Annika departed, walking past a surprised RJ without a word. 'May I come in?' the Texan asked, tipping his hat in the direction of Annika's departing back.

  'Sure.' Phil said, slumping down on the couch once again.

  'You look awful down for a man that's just had himself a visit from the Lieutenant.' RJ said, a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

  'It's... It's not like I don't appreciate her advances RJ, I just... It's not proper is it?'

  RJ smiled but said nothing.

  'One minute she'll be filling me in on the nature of the mission we're on and the next she's getting all close and personal with me and it's just very disconcerting to me as I don't know how to deal with that.'

  RJ nodded, ordering neat whiskey from the replicator without asking.

  'I mean, I get that I did great things and all but she called me a hero. Perhaps compared to Darwin's blunders I seem heroic but if that was your standards for heroism then the average Joe on the street could do the job too.'

  The pilot handed him the glass and they retired to the sofa, once again he said nothing.

  'I just feel she's a little too enamoured with me for her own good but I don't know what to do about it without ruining the bond we have developed as a crew.'

  RJ waited patiently for any more words before beginning. 'Captain, there's something you should know about that Annika girl. She's a mighty fine Lieutenant and a great officer and a credit to this ship, probably has the brightest noggin out of the lot of us. She has a flaw though, and I probably should have warned you of it before.'

  'A flaw?' Phil prompted.

  RJ leaned back in the sofa and let out a long breath. 'Yes sir, a mighty big one. She warned me about it when we were on the way to negotiations and I'm assuming she's told St... Smith as well.'

  This was most surprising, it looked as if RJ of all people was uncomfortable with talking about this.

  'Thing is.' he continued, 'She told me this in confidence see? I don't know if I can tell you without wrecking our own confidence and losing my only whiskey partner again.'

  Phil downed the whiskey in one, tears formed in his eyes and he hoped the gesture was appreciated. 'Tell me.' he managed to sputter.

  A slight smile crept onto RJ's features. 'Right you are sir. Well I'm guessing that because you hadn't set foot off Earth until lately you don't know a great deal about slave trading and all that, right?'

  'I know slavery still exists, I'm not entirely reclusive.'

  'Right, well I ain't talking about slavery on Earth. I'm talking about slave trading. The sort you get out in the depths of space between cargo ships that Star Command turns a blind eye to.'

  'What has slave trading got to do with Annika's problem?'

  'She was a slave.'

  'Ah.' Phil said.

  'Yes sir, ah indeed. She went from being an innocent trader's daughter to something else entirely.'

  Phil waited for more but RJ had slumped into an uncomfortable silence, cradling his drink and taking long and uncharacteristically deliberate sips from it.

  'There's something you're not telling me...' Phil ventured, waiting to be filled in and slightly annoyed that the man was leaving him hanging on what had initially seemed like a vital piece of information.

  'It's just that... Captain... she...'

  'Spit it out man!' Phil snapped, surprising himself. 'That's an order!'

  Phil's record of continuing to make people sigh was well on course after that sentence.

  'The trader slaves are... altered.'

  'Altered?'

  RJ shifted uncomfortably in his seat. 'Yes sir, altered. The female slaves are given a cocktail of drugs that quadruples their libido, to the point that they'll willingly... copulate with anyone that asks.' he saw the look in Phil's eyes and quickly amended. 'Annika is not quite like that, apparently she was rescued before the changes were irreversible. There are still some side-effects that she'll live with for the rest of her days though.'

  'That's horrible.'

  'That it is, Captain.' RJ agreed. 'Just be careful when she takes a shine to you, she has a tendency to go into things very quickly.'

  'I'll take that under advisement.'

  'You're in charge here Captain.' RJ replied over his drink, keeping his eyes on the Phil's uniform. 'You have to lead by example and if you go flirting with other crew members it'll look unprofessional to the rest of the people under your command.'

  Phil knew that he had absolutely no intention of trying to take advantage of Annika's situation, given that in order to do so he'd have to trigger his own distinctly awkward problems when speaking to women in general. 'You have nothing to worry about RJ, I'm not going to lay a hand upon her.'

  An expression of relief quickly gave way to a smirk over the pilot's features. 'Good to hear, Captain. Shall we move on to other things? Is there anything else troubling you of late?'

  Phil stared down at his hand and flexed the stubby little fingers, was this the hand of a man who could blast off into the universe and save mankind from impending invasion?

  'Ah, need say no more. I reckon I have a good idea as to what's troubling you the most right now.' RJ replied to himself over the glass. 'You think that darn fool glove is the only reason you made it last time round and now you're expecting nothing but doom since you ain't got it no more.'

  'Annika told me we were the same.' he said, not willing to contribute much in response. 'I ju
st don't see it myself. You guys have made a life out here in space doing all sorts of things, before this I was nothing but a fat man playing computer games. How can I be the bravest man she's ever met if I'm frightened of everything?'

  The silence hung in the room for an extended period of time as RJ gave his Captain an appraising look. 'Who says you can't be afraid and brave? It ain't about charging in without a thought to the dangers around you. If that were the only requirement for a Captain then Darwin would still be running this ship. You might have a healthy concern for all the things that could go wrong, but I just call that a sound mind. Compared to some of the folk that are running Star Command you're a first rate tactician.'

  He lapsed into silence and silence decided to wrap itself about the room. It was quite a nice room after all.

  'Bravery isn't going to be enough to save the world, RJ. Even if you do think I have it.'

  The silence was affronted by this intrusion into its newly-claimed space, but soon reasserted itself as Phil waited for a response from his confidant.

  Moments passed by in a blue-purple haze that tinted the windows of the Captain's quarters, neither man spoke as each mused over their thoughts. The onus was on RJ to reply but the pilot took his time, determined not to be rushed by the gravity of the situation. The moments continued to flutter through the space and time surrounding the unchristened ship, and with each one that passed the Voravian invasion grew nearer.

  'It all boils down to belief in the end, Captain.' RJ finally said after another round of drinks. 'This crew came back for you because we believed in you. We believed that while the glove may have had a... helping hand in what you did, it was mostly you that dictated the actions that unfolded. Your choices, your decisions, your own destiny that we put so much faith into the first time around.'

  Phil nodded at him, unconvinced. 'I hope you're right, for all our sakes.'

  The doors shot open and both men found their feet, RJ's hand reflexively jumping to his hip and coming up with a small laser pistol ready to burn a hole in whatever was intruding.

  'Is this the bathroom?' the spindly figure of Doctor Samej asked, doing the familiar dance of those with weak bladders.